- Decluttering Daily
- Posts
- Friendship & Boundaries
Friendship & Boundaries
Set Healthy Boundaries to Strengthen Friendships and Find Peace
Jimmy Helmick
April 28, 2025
Click here to share.
When I first started learning about essentialism, one of the first big steps I took was setting better boundaries. I thought people would cheer me on. Spoiler alert. They did not. Some people got annoyed. Some acted hurt. Some disappeared without a word. At first, I felt guilty. I worried maybe I was being selfish or too harsh. But sticking with it taught me something simple and life changing. People who get upset by your boundaries are often the very reason you need them. Learning to say no was not about pushing people away. It was about protecting what mattered most. The friendships that were meant to last grew stronger. The ones built on guilt, convenience, or obligation quietly faded. A healthy friendship is built on trust, mutual respect, and space to grow. So let’s jump into it. Oh, and if you find value in this, please share it with someone you care about. |  |
Simple & Sustainable
Everyone loves the idea of boundaries until it affects them.
Suddenly, it is selfish or cold to say no, to need space, or to not be instantly available.
But real boundaries are about building stronger, healthier friendships. The kind that feel safe, not stressful.
Therapist Laurel Healy points out that setting clear boundaries helps fix small problems early before they turn into deep resentment. If you never speak up, frustration builds quietly underneath, and even good friendships can fall apart without anyone understanding why.
Researcher Brené Brown reminds us that when you respect your own limits, you are not being selfish. You are actually creating more space to show up with true empathy, kindness, and love for the people who matter most.
A 2021 study also found that friends who talk through tough conversations together have lower stress hormone levels than people who face challenges with strangers. When trust and healthy boundaries are already in place, even hard conversations feel safer and strengthen the relationship instead of weakening it.
This week is not about making dramatic changes. No big speeches. No cutting people off.
It is simply about paying closer attention. Putting your energy into the friendships that are good for you.
‘BC’ comic strip by John Hart.
Daily Doables
Here are seven simple actions to help enhance your friendships and protect your peace. I’ve attached a more detailed, printable version of this checklist below. Let me know if you find it helpful.
Mon: List five contacts and label them Energizing or Draining.
Tue: Say no to one small request without guilt or overexplaining.
Wed: Wait at least one hour before replying to any non urgent message.
Thu: Unfollow or mute three accounts that drain your energy.
Fri: Send a sincere message to someone you genuinely care about.
Sat: Write and practice a short boundary phrase for yourself.
Sun: Schedule time with a friend who leaves you feeling supported.
Let me know what you tried!
Parting Points
Essentialism taught me that protecting your time and energy is not selfish. It is what makes real connection possible.
The right friendships will not just survive your boundaries. They will get stronger because of them.
You are not here to be everything to everyone. You are here to protect what matters most.
Next week, we will take this even deeper as we talk about emotional clutter. That invisible weight we carry from old stories, guilt, and expectations that no longer serve us.
A fairly broad topic, but as always, we’ll break it down into small, manageable pieces.
Lastly, if you ever want to talk through what is feeling heavy or unclear in your life, I offer a free, clutter-free call.
No pitches. No pressure.
Just a real conversation about what you want more of and how to make space for it.
You can grab a time here.
Yours in Simplicity,
|
Reply